Dear Reader,

Divorce is a very powerful thing; it is the knife that cuts through a relationship of love, a separation that splits a family apart, and many times it is a well of emptiness that leaves children feeling alone. Although it may occur upon accident and seemingly for the better, divorce affects both the parents and children within a family in such a way that the mere mention of the memory brings sadness that’s unforgettable.

It’s terrible to say that divorce breaks up a family and makes the children depressed and forever broken-hearted, but it happens so much that it has become one of the main causes for rebellion and suicidal behavior among the world’s youth today. But please don’t forgey, the Lord blesses those who seek and follow Him through every circumstance and fear they encounter, and promises salvation to those who continue to follow His ways even through times of heartache and hopelessness.

In 1 Peter 4:12-13 it says, “Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.”

The Lord knows what we go through, especially for children who have divorced parents. Even though they may be broken and hurt inside, these children should know that the Lord is by their side no matter what, and that they should be reminded that Jesus Christ also went through deep suffering and heartache, and they’re not alone.  Children should also learn from their parents’ example and set new principles and standards for their future marriages.

Kevin Groeneveld, CCA’s secondary school Psychology and Apologetics teacher and a family counselor, gives great advice on this subject: “These children need a healthy outlet to talk about their parents’ struggles, without the tug of war influence and they also need a good support system, whether it’s a trustworthy adult, relative, friend, teacher, or others who are honest and loving people—extended family. The nonnegotiable for these children is to honor and obey their parents, so even in a midst of a divorce, it is still important for children to love and forgive their parents, even if they don’t agree with what their parents’ decision to divorce.”

A good note to add, is that in order for children of divorced parents to be healed and follow God’s ways, they must forgive their parents, and never blame themselves for the divorce, for it had nothing to do with them. They should also make sure that they have someone that they can talk to so things are never held inside and they can live healthy lives.

I keep hearing about the issue of cutting.

Why do people do it? What can we do as Christians to help them?

Cutting isn’t something that you hear much about on the nightly news or on national cover stories, but with the well-kept secret gaining more and more awareness, no one can deny its devastation on many teenagers. Teen suicide, drinking, and pregnancies seem to attract a lot of publicity, but how often is the issue of cutting addressed? The non-profit organization, To Write Love on Her Arms, raises awareness to the seriousness of self-injury.

So why do teens cut? It turns out there can be a lot of reasons why, and stress is a bigger factor than a lot of people realize. A source that asked to remain anonymous explained: “I do it because I can’t deal with all of the emotional pain that I am going through, so everything that I can’t say out loud, I bleed out.”

Something is wrong with the world when people can no longer hear the silent struggles of those around us. Since when can’t we notice a quick look of pain on a friend? The pulled-down sleeves to hide the scars? Too many people ask, “why do they do this?” That’s not the real question. The real question is “what have you done lately to help?” And the first step is to understand.

When a person cuts, it’s to express a deep frustration, a sadness and anger that just won’t go away. The pressure can come in the form of worry over schoolwork, fighting with friends, relationships, and family problems. Another reason is self-consciousness—kids today are more worried about how they look, what people think of them, how many friends they have, and if they are accepted than ever before. I don’t think we truly understand how much of what people say affects young adults. It can be a joke or a comment, a mean name, a rude remark. Any of these things can hurt someone deep enough to make him or her cut as a way to show how he or she feels, or as a form of punishment as a result of self-hatred. Something made them feel like they are unworthy or not good enough, and it may have been something we said, knowingly or not.

“…your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God[.] You are not your own,” (1 Corinthians 6:19). And cutting threatens that temple. Sometimes, cutting turns accidently fatal, and an expression of depression becomes a means of suicide.

“Its a way for them to feel in control and to deal with things,” explained Alison Stapleton.

Cutting is a dangerous expression of problems, and there are other ways to cope. You can write a poem explaining how things are, write a song, read a book, listen to music—or you can pray. “God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. There fore we will not fear,” (Psalm 46:2). God can help carry the burdens that many teens and kids have today. He loves and cares about us and hates to see us struggle. If you know someone who is cutting, pray for them and tell them about a God who has already bled for us. You may just save a life.

At the time this edition was going to press, we learned that the anonymous teen accepted Christ as their Savior after a church service at Calvary. He/she  feels calmer and more confident than he/she did without Him.

I really don’t understand the problem with drinking. God created alcohol so it’s okay, right? Why is consumption of alcohol considered a sin? And why shouldn’t teenagers drink?

“Our body is a temple,” begins Miss Allison Stapleton, secondary school guidance counselor. Such a profound, five-word phrase has so much biblical truth, based on 1 Corinthians 6:19-20: “Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.”

Seventy-four percent of high school students nationwide have had one or more drinks of alcohol during their lifetime, according to a study by the Center for Disease Control and Prevention in 2005. So, are we forgetting that drinking under the age of 21 is illegal? Well not anymore, according to the Alcohol Policy Information System. As of January 1, 2009, underage possession of alcohol is prohibited, but consumption is not explicitly prohibited in the state of Florida. But just because our state does not prohibit consumption of alcohol under the age of 21, doesn’t necessarily make it right.

Each year, students spend $5.5 billion on alcohol, more than they spend on soft drinks, tea, milk, juice, coffee or books combined. Clearly, alcohol has become an idol for students across the nation. “Our generation wants the numbness of a binge, not just fun,” states Miss Stapleton.

Mrs. Tina Reeder, CCA Health teacher adds, “Why do you think students can’t just stop at one drink? There’s a reason why alcohol shouldn’t be consumed under the age of 21. Emotionally, minors just can’t handle it. Small things lead to big things. Check the statistics of teen pregnancy related to alcohol.” Studies show that sixty percent of college women diagnosed with a sexually transmitted disease were drunk at the time of infection, according to the Advocacy Institute.

“An escape from life,” Miss Stapleton responded when asked why she finds most teenagers turn to alcohol in the first place. This is why consumption of alcohol is wrong; it is used as an escape, when Christ wants us to turn to Him as our escape. Turn to Him, for He is the only One who satisfies.

Question: I am fifteen years old and my boyfriend wanst more than just hold hands. What does the Bible say about kissing?

About… K.I.S.S.I.N.G.

Dear Reader,

Thank you for your note. I hope the rest of this article helps you make the right choice…

We have all seen it a hundred times. It is during that epic battle, a conversation in the rain, or after a slow dance where the magic of a kiss is unveiled. In the midst of chaotic and confusing circumstances, a kiss seems to empower the hero with hope and give him the strength to keep on fighting. Suddenly, the tide changes, the battle is won, and the hero emerges victorious. Everyone sighs when he kisses the love of his life at the end of the movie and they ride off into the distance as the credits begin to roll.

Yet over time, movies have tarnished the act of a kiss, making it cheap and invaluable. It is no longer unique, but rather given out to anyone at anytime. Instead of it being a special and precious gift, it has become simply a stepping-stone to further physical intimacy. But what our world has failed to realize is that every “true love’s kiss” comes with strings attached. It’s like there are three paths, or roads, that you have to progress down in every relationship: the emotional/spiritual, intimacy, and commitment. In God’s plan, you progress down them together, at the same pace. But what’s happened in our world is that we no longer want to commit to anything. We don’t want to be tied down, so we go right down the path to intimacy.

Instead of waiting until we have walked along a little further on all three paths, we put our relationship on fast-forward and let our emotions take hold of us. Self-control goes out the window, and denying one’s flesh is quickly forgotten. But when a kiss becomes a first-date ritual, it loses its value. A kiss shouldn’t simply be a kiss. It should be a sign, a symbol that signifies that a couple is ready to commit to one another and that they have come to a deeper level of emotional and spiritual understanding.

Although if may be difficult to deny our physical desires and take it slow, in the long run, the wait will make each step even sweeter. But how do we resist temptation while we wait? Christ is the only one who can give us the strength to stand firm when temptation comes knocking on our door, so we must call upon Him to help guide our decisions and commitments. Ask Him to help you avoid tricky situations and to give you the wisdom and strength to not compromise your standards.